I’ve noticed a lot of changes in myself as a direct consequence of aging. Overall, I have a higher level of composure than I did as a 30 year old. I’m better at accepting without agreeing with points of view that diverge from my own on almost any subject. Well, maybe not accepting but listen and not argue. I more regularly and rigorously remind myself that my beliefs – even my strongly held ones – are not facts, and that each of my corresponding points of view is simply that, mine. I use the IMHO a lot more now. I think I’ve attained some wisdom (as distinguished from enlightenment) from having my backside kicked multiple times and as a result, make generally better choices than I did at 30 or 40 and maybe even at 50.
Three developments have surprised me as I’ve aged, however:
First, my patience regarding some things has actually diminished, which contradicts what I was led to believe by my parents and others – that I’d become much more patient as I got older. As a result, I now avoid two types of people like the plague: The first are those who uniformly put their own interests ahead of those of other people, including their own families and closest friends. The key word here is “uniformly.” The second are people who I refer to as “naysayers, doomsdayers, and dreamslayers.” Those people view every glass as half empty and every personal aspiration as out-of-reach or self-indulgent.
The second development is my sense of urgency and desire to accomplish things as my vitality naturally diminishes with age. I want to get out and see more of our country, spend time in our motor home and travel, do more with my hobbies (Ham Radio, genealogy and others), take classes on things I never thought I would have an interest in years ago (History and writing). I feel as if I have a long way to go and a short – or shorter – time to get there.
The third development: my frustration with people who have stopped growing and are OK with that. These are people who seem to believe that the first 25% of life is for growing and the last 75% is for resting. They are who they are going to be. They’re satisfied, entitled, bored or resentful. Their skills are outdated and/or their perspectives have congealed and solidified. They pine for the way things used to be and whine about how things are, although, I do fall back on this at times as I see some things that sure worked better before the last few changes were implemented and see where we should make corrections on some new implementations to make them better. Many regard themselves as victims and all others as villains, this I probably hate the most, the people that always blame their current predicament on others, the economy, the last employer, etc. They need to quit blaming and just get out and fix the current, and sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to, but if you have a plan it will lead to things you want to do.
Here are my wishes for all of you: Create the life you dream about. No excuses, no blame, no guilt. Build a plan and carry out that plan,and make changes as you need to. Do more; give more; help more, learn more, save some. Become the person you have always wanted to be. Establish goals and take relevant action toward their achievement. Measure your progress; make course corrections along the way. Learn from your mistakes, of which there will be many if you’re actually doing things. Read the great books, not just the trivial for entertainment. Visit museums. Develop new skills. Make new friends and appreciate the ones you already have. Focus on the things in your life that make you happy and force you to move forward.
Most of all, whatever your aspirations, never quit!